I went into the grocery store to pick up some chicken. Not my favorite store, but its the once closest to my house. Sadly, the days when Buddy was so very ill, I went here often because I needed to make my purchases and get home quickly afterwards.
This store has no memories except the ones attached to his illness. There are items I purchased often during those times that I have never regularly purchased before and do not now. I walk by the shelves that house those items. Things I no longer purchase. Things that remind me of him or his illness or his needs or his medications or his difficulties during treatment. It is all there. It is those items that bring the sadness to the forefront once again.
I need to find another store to buy my food. This deep sadness never strikes when I shop in other stores. Just this one store holds the power to bring sorrow. I assume that it will always bring some pain here and again. I know it won't always be this sharp and difficult hurt. But, I guess I feel like I shouldn't hurt at all. If there are other stores where the pain never joins me, then why subject myself to these difficult and hurtful times? I just need to take care to shop elsewhere, at least for now.
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